Episode 18 - When Believing God Becomes Trusting God
- Glory & Grit
- Jun 21
- 12 min read
Show Notes:
Summary
In this episode of Glory & Grit, Stephanie sits down with Matt Melvin for a conversation about faith, surrender, accountability, and what it means to trust God when life strips away your sense of control.
Matt shares about a near-death moment that became a spiritual turning point, a prison season he describes as “Bible Bootcamp,” and the difference between simply believing in God and truly trusting Him. Through his story, Matt reflects on repentance, discipline, humility, accountability, and how God used a difficult season to wake him up and reshape his foundation.
This conversation reminds us that God can meet us in hard places, but He also invites us to respond — to surrender, repent, take ownership, and allow Him to rebuild what has been broken.
About Matt Melvin
IG- Bulliedbehindbars
X- Barsbullied
Facebook- Matthew.Melvin.5621
Email- Bulliedbehindbars@gmail.com
Bio
Matthew Melvin is the author of Bullied Behind Bars: A Gay Christian Trump Supporter Goes to Prison, a memoir that explores faith, identity, adversity, and redemption. His life journey has included expulsion from school, conversion therapy, incarceration, and the challenge of rebuilding after significant setbacks.
Through these experiences, Matthew discovered the power of resilience, personal accountability, and hope. Today, he shares his story to inspire others to look beyond labels, learn from their mistakes, and recognize that their past does not have to define their future.
Through writing, speaking, and media appearances, Matthew encourages people to persevere through adversity, embrace personal growth, and believe in the possibility of second chances. His mission is to help others find hope, purpose, and redemption regardless of the challenges they have faced.
Key Topics
The difference between believing in God and truly trusting God
Matt’s near-death wake-up moment and the choice to let God lead
Moving from a “lukewarm” faith to surrender and spiritual discipline
Matt’s prison season as “Bible Bootcamp”
Letting go of control and learning deeper dependence on God
Moving from victim mindset to ownership, repentance, and accountability...
Takeaways
Belief and trust are not always the same thing. Sometimes life reveals where we believe in God but still struggle to let Him lead.
Hard seasons can become rebuilding places. Matt describes prison as a season where God strengthened his foundation through Scripture, prayer, fasting, and discipline.
Surrender often begins when control is stripped away. When Matt could not control his circumstances, he had to learn deeper dependence on God.
God can use wake-up moments to redirect us. Matt’s near-death experience became a turning point that caused him to examine his life and faith.
Growth requires ownership. Part of Matt’s testimony is moving from a victim mindset into repentance, responsibility, and change.
Accountability matters. We need people who will lovingly tell us the truth, not just agree with us.
Transcript:
Stephanie (00:01)
Today's conversation is with Matt Melvin. Matt's story has a lot of layers, but the heart of this episode is about learning the difference between believing in God and truly trusting him. Matt shares about a near death moment, a prison season he describes as Bible boot camp, and how God uses surrender, discipline, accountability, and repentance to reshape his life.
As you listen, I invite you to think about your own life too, especially the places where control has been stripped away. And God may be inviting you to trust him one surrendered step at a time. Here's my conversation with Matt Melvin.
Stephanie (00:55)
I'd like to introduce you to Matt Melvin.
Matt Melvin (00:59)
Thank you so much for having me on the show.
Stephanie (01:03)
It's great to have you. For our listeners who are meeting you for the first time and may not know you or may not know your whole story, can you just give us a little short version of the season that we're going to be discussing about your testimony?
Matt Melvin (01:22)
wanted to share my testimony about how God came into my life in a really challenging portion of my life. In August 2015, I was driving on 495 in the middle lane going 72 miles an hour when a Lexus SUV came down an embankment, crossed in front of my car, but by the grace of God I was saved, I was protected.
That's the moment I believe God was drawing the line in the sand saying, you're either gonna do my will or you're gonna continue to do your own will. You're gonna lie, cheat, and steal. And I didn't want that. I was a lukewarm Christian. I was going to church on Sundays and then I was going back to my old life. And as God says, He'd rather you be all in for Him or cold. He will spit out a lukewarm Christian.
Stephanie (02:19)
that. So what in you changed after that? How did your life change?
Matt Melvin (02:27)
I did the 12 steps overcoming I was addicted to stealing. A lot of people think that the 12 steps only apply to drugs and alcohol. That's not true. Those 12 steps can apply to any addiction that anyone is going through. Here's the kicker.
It has to be a lifestyle change. It isn't just how quickly can I get through these 12 steps, said and done. What you put into it is what you get out of it.
Stephanie (02:53)
Yes!
Exactly. I remember one of our church groups using the 12 steps and anyone could come if you're addicted to food maybe. There was a person there addicted to food so those 12 steps are really good for more than just alcohol.
We did our pre-interview, you talked about this little phrase that I love, Bible Boot Camp. What does that mean? Or what do you mean when you say Bible Boot Camp?
Matt Melvin (03:37)
The second time I went to prison, 10 institutions, four states, 16 months in prison, and then a month and a half in a halfway house, I spent a lot of time in solitary confinement. And that's the time I believe that God was transforming my life, picking it apart. And I called it Bible Bootcamp because I went to every single Bible study that was available.
Jehovah's Witness, Christian Science, Scientology, Catholics, good old Christians and it gave me a very strong foundation. If a Christian's foundation is not strong, the wind and the tsunami will come through and blow it all over.
Stephanie (04:32)
Yes, that is so true.
Matt Melvin (04:34)
We as Christians need to be in that Bible every single day. We need to be praying, we need to be fasting, we need to be exercising, making our bed every single day. Those are the disciplines that I developed when I was in prison and I bring with me in everything that I do.
Stephanie (04:55)
One of the other things that you talked about was the illusion that we have that we're in control, but God is really the one who's in control. what did God teach you when your control was stripped away from you?
Matt Melvin (05:13)
My control was stripped away when I was in prison. My control was stripped away when I... in January 4th, 2022 when I was driving on... and freezing rain and ice and I saw one car hit each other and hit the guardrails in Concord, New Hampshire. But God was protecting me. He looked out for me. He guided me.
Stephanie (05:43)
What helped you keep your faith day by day? I know you said you had a stint in prison and you had many seasons that we won't even get to cover today. But when you were going through it, what helped you keep your faith going every day?
Matt Melvin (06:01)
Knowing that Paul and Peter, all of these amazing men in the Bible paved the way for men like me. And look, Paul spent a lot of time in prison and he and Silas would jump up and down and make the best of a bad situation. Look, there's always two ways to look at a situation. You can look at it half empty or half full. It's all about perspective.
Stephanie (06:31)
True. Did you have a favorite scripture that you thought about a lot when you were going through your hard seasons?
Matt Melvin (06:46)
Mine was about Moses going up to the mountain and coming back and seeing all the golden calves, the idolatry going on, and being royally irritated, to say the least.
Stephanie (07:07)
And what did you feel about that? How did you feel that you could relate that scripture story to what was going on to you, to yourself?
Matt Melvin (07:16)
It goes on every single day. I'm going out to the minefield trying to bring God and my testimony to the world and it doesn't want to receive it. It's distracted by unimportant activities.
Here's the thing, just like in everything in life, the person has to have a want and desire to change their life.
Stephanie (07:49)
Exactly. Exactly. How did God change you? How did God change the way that you saw yourself?
Matt Melvin (08:03)
I was a victim in my own head for most of my life. God woke me up, told me to stop being victim, to start taking ownership, start taking responsibility for my past, repenting and changing. Look, there's two types of people, Stephanie, in my estimation, and I've said this on several podcasts. There's your Saul's and there's your David's. Saul.
Stephanie (08:04)
Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm.
Matt Melvin (08:30)
was when confronted by the prophet Samuel lied and said, there's no donkeys and wild animals here when God specifically told him not to have animals, wealth, gold, women, or power because all of those will distract you from the need of God.
And we've seen it time and time again from many, many kings. They bring in gold and women and then they're all of a sudden distracted. And then there's your David's. When confronted, David admitted he had an affair and he was quick to repent. If you, I was a Saul for a lot of my life. Now I'm a David.
Stephanie (09:25)
What did that season also teach you about humility?
Matt Melvin (09:31)
I have to be humble in everything that I do. I mean, let's just call a spade a spade. When you're in prison, it is a very humbling experience.
Stephanie (09:38)
⁓ Right?
How did being humble change the way that you depended on God?
Matt Melvin (09:51)
It made me much more dependent on God.
Stephanie (09:54)
Mm-hmm. you talked about your near-death experience and how that was a turning point for you. Can you share? How you believe God used that moment and what followed it like putting you on the right path. How did you jump from, this is accident and this is a traumatic moment in my life and hey, I need to get myself together and get with God?
Matt Melvin (10:22)
I had my Bible in my passenger seat and I said to myself, God shouldn't be in the passenger seat. God needs to be in the driver's seat. Jesus, take the wheel. Carry underwood.
Stephanie (10:25)
Mm-hmm.
Jesus take the weight off. Yes, yes.
When you surrendered or what did surrendering to God look like for you?
Matt Melvin (10:49)
giving up my old life and being a renewed creation.
Stephanie (10:58)
being renewed in him.
For people who are going through hard seasons right now and they may be feeling their life is not their own or they may have that victim mentality that you talked about earlier, what would you say to help those people come out of that mentality?
Matt Melvin (11:16)
Their life isn't their own. I would agree with that.
Stephanie (11:32)
learn that there is a better way and that - who their life really belongs to.
Matt Melvin (11:38)
One, I would say find an accountability partner. This person should be a man if you're a man, a woman if you're a woman. This person is not your best friend. This person will hold you accountable for your actions. I also believe that language is key. I can, within five minutes, pick up whether this person is somebody that I want to be around or not.
Just by a couple of things that they may say. How many times do they use the word you, versus I? It's a lot easier to use you, we, they. However, here's the kicker. It doesn't show ownership for my decisions that I make. I come to the world very different than everybody else. In other words, my reality
Stephanie (12:15)
you
Matt Melvin (12:36)
is very different than Stephanie's reality, for example.
Stephanie (12:40)
Mm-hmm.
Matt Melvin (12:44)
The human mind can convince itself that anything is okay. I can say to myself a hundred times that I can walk on water, when in fact I can only walk on water when there's a
sheet of ice right underneath me. So the human mind can try to justify anything.
Stephanie (12:57)
Mm-hmm. That is very true.
Matt Melvin (13:07)
I did it! I tried to justify the stealing. This person is well off. They don't need it. That's justification.
Stephanie (13:15)
It's so easy to rationalize. Yeah, yes. You're right, it's very easy.
Matt Melvin (13:17)
It doesn't matter. It doesn't matter if they're rich. It's not my money.
Whether it's a pencil or whether it's a car, in God's eyes, it is the same, One sin is the same as 100 sins. This is how you have to look at it. God is on one side of a cliff and you're on the other. Every time you sin, that cliff moves farther and farther away from Jesus. So, be a David and admit fault and get closer to God.
Stephanie (13:46)
Yes.
Awesome, awesome. What is something that we may not have talked about that you would like to leave people with when you came on the show? What is something you said, I want to make sure they know this?
Matt Melvin (14:11)
What other people think of me is none of my business.
Stephanie (14:13)
Amen. Amen, brother. I love that saying and I have to work on that a lot. What God thinks of you is what's most important because He's the one you have to answer to.
Well, I have really enjoyed talking with you.
Matt Melvin (14:37)
My book is called Bully Behind Bars, a gay Christian Trump supporter goes to prison. I'm available on Instagram, Bully Behind Bars, X, Bars Bullied, Facebook, Matthew.Melvin.5621. Follow me, reach out to me. You can email me, Bully Behind Bars, at gmail.com.
Stephanie (14:39)
Thank you. There you go.
So, and.
Matt Melvin (15:01)
Don't think that your issues are isolated. Reach out to somebody.
Please don't think that you're alone.
Find a group, good group of men, if you're a man, if you're a woman, a woman, that you can be around that will build you up.
Stephanie (15:30)
said that many times. And for those who are hard-headed or thick-headed and want to argue, why would you say that men should be with men and the women should be with women and that partner should not be your best friend?
Matt Melvin (15:50)
My best friend and I shouldn't be accountability partners because I will go easy on him and I will let things slide that shouldn't slide.
Stephanie (16:04)
So for those of you who are thinking, I can help it be my best friend. No, you can't because they're going to give you a break. They're going to go, ⁓ I know you're so hard. You're struggling, whatever. it needs to be someone who's actually going to hold you accountable.
Matt Melvin (16:22)
and I'd like to go to 2 Chronicles 10-8 for one moment. This part of the Bible is talking about Rehoboam. The Israelites
Stephanie (16:25)
I know you found one, yay! Okay.
Matt Melvin (16:35)
are complaining to Rhea Boehme that they're being taxed too heavily.
What happens is, Ria Boam seeks out counsel from the elders, then he seeks out counsel from people his own age. Instead of seeking out counsel from elders, he decides that he wants to seek out the counsel from his buddies. Here's why that's an issue,
Stephanie (16:55)
Mm-hmm.
Matt Melvin (17:11)
He wanted to surround himself with people that would give him a yes.
Stephanie (17:16)
Yes, man
Matt Melvin (17:20)
What happens is...
Stephanie (17:25)
Yeah, did not turn out well.
Matt Melvin (17:26)
It didn't turn out well for him.
Stephanie (17:31)
So there's a very good supporter of what we've already said is surround yourself with people who will truly hold you accountable and call you out. You don't want someone who's just gonna constantly be saying, yes, yes, that's right, that's right, you'll get over it, you'll do better.
What would you say to the person who believes in God, but they're in a season where they're struggling to actually trust him?
Matt Melvin (18:02)
We talked about that on our pre-podcast. There's a lot of people that believe in God, but there's not a lot of people that trust in God. And trust, folks, is that sixth sense. And that faith. If the person can't accept Genesis 1-1 in faith, might as well close the Bible and move on to something else.
All of the answers to our life are in that. One of the most famous coaches in the world, John Maxwell, all of his teachings come directly out of the Old Testament, Everything that John Maxwell teaches, he got right out of the Bible. So you can spend a lot of money and go to any one of John Maxwell's coaching seminars.
Stephanie (18:45)
You
Matt Melvin (18:56)
Or you could do it for free and just open up your Bible.
Stephanie (18:59)
Alright, that is Matt Melvin and his testimony.
Matt Melvin (19:04)
Alright, thank you very much.
Stephanie (19:06)
Okay, friend, maybe your story looks nothing like Matt's, but maybe you do know what it feels like to have control stripped away. Maybe you believe in God, but you're in a season when trusting him feels harder than you expected. I hope that this conversation reminds you that
Trust is often learned one step, one prayer, one surrendered moment at a time. And even in the places where we wouldn't have chosen, God is still able to meet us, shape us, and call us closer to him. Thank you for spending this time with us today.
You can find more information about Matt, today's podcast, including a reflection guide at gloryandgridpodcast.com.
Until next time, friend, keep looking for God's glory in the middle of your grit. Bye now...
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